After feeling off, overly tired since a week before Halloween, that funky virus or infection or whatever it was/is that I felt lurking in my body all that time finally kicked in. Jaiden got sick on Friday, and by Sunday, it was my turn. I got sick. Really sick. Sicker than I have been in years. It has been 8 days now, and with 3 of those days spent in bed, two days of missed work, and a multitude of natural remedies in my system, I am finally on my path to recovery without antibiotics and without a trip to the Dr.'s. It wasn't too surprising I knew I had something lingering in my system for a long time, and I suddenly found myself juggling the stress of having my son back and all the details that needed to be handled, and the pressure of not having come up with the $$ I need to keep my house and h aving my hours at work cut back even more, (and now even more!) My stress level pretty much sky rocketed, and thus my immune system dropped.

My energy is still not what it should be. I'm sure that is to be expected. I still have lingering symptons that will probably take some time to fully clear up, and what I think is a blown ear drum from the sinus pressure in my left ear. But I am so happy to be feeling so much better. I am back at work for my second day this week. YAYE! I am on the path to wellness again, and to maintaining it.

Sunday I woke up without a voice, feeling worse than before after 6 days of being sick, but Sunday was the magical day when the symptons finally broke and I finally started to feel better.
While sick, and very scared at the intensity of the symptons and my inability to get out of bed for more than just a few minutes I started doing research on the internet. I self-diagnosed and learned that I may have a Candida (Yeast) overgrowth in my intestines that is causing my inbalance that has left me susceptible to sinusitis infections (that I now believe are fungal not bacterial, thus why they are not responsive to antibiotics).

Last summer I was having some strange problems with my stomache and anything I ate after 3 pm would make my stomache bloated and leave me feel sick for the entire night. It was Hiram's mom who suggested it might be Candida. I did some research and started on some Probiotics (pill form and in liquid form, Kefir). Within 2 weeks my stomach problems were gone and I didn't think about it again until this terrifyingly painful and intense bout of Sinusitis. While searching the internet for naturopathic sinus infection remedies, I discovered some interesting articles that suggested that sinusitis may be caused from candida overgrowth that then makes the body more susceptible to the fungus's that are introduced into our bodies everyday. I realized that during the previous five weeks before the infection I hadn't felt well, my stomache had been acting up similarly to how it did last summer, only now it was all the time, every meal left me feeling sick and bloated. I also realized that last year when I got on antibiotics it helped clear up my infection but that it didn't seem to really solve the problem and I always get another and another, and am usually dis-eased all winter long. So I made a plan.

Hiram drove me to Whole Foods as I still wasn't feeling well enough to go anywhere for any length of time and I purchased "Powerbiotics" which is a pill form of pro-biotics, and I take 3 daily all at once with food usually at lunch time. I also purchased grape seed extract which is a powerful antioxidant (although I was acutally intending to get grapefruit seed extract, but got the grape seed extract by mistake). I try and take that 2-3 times a day (I'm very forgetful and with everything I'm using I tend to forget a dose here or there). I had already been taking Emergen C in the Acai Berry flavor, I try to take at least 2-3 a day to help boost my immunity as I am a firm believer in the power of Vitamin C and B Vitams on the body's ability to handle stress and to stay or get healthy. I drank a lot of water, (constantly) and HerbaTussin tea 2-4 times a day as well as it is very soothing and effective. I purchased a cheap Neti Pot from Walgreens that I started using with warm saline (made from a packet of salt that came with the pot and distilled water) once the left side of my sinuses finally came unplugged enough to let anything through. That is by far the most soothing and effective thing I have ever used with a sinus infection and just wish I would have gotten one years ago to help me with these. Then I started eating a highly concentrated garlic paste, and horseradish (I love horseradish to help clear my sinuses when I am sick, I actually crave it!) I was also using Tylenol for the pain in my head, sinuses, and the horrible ear ache and sore throat. I use Ricola Natural Throat drops. I used Mucinex (1/2 the suggested dosage) as a decongestant. I had to take long hot showers to sooth my aching body and to help clear my head out. Also I used hot pots of water with a towel over my head to get steam into my body as I was too sick to try and find my humidifier. I tried to stay in bed as much as was possible and sleep whenever I could as trying to sleep at night was challenging as I would wake up because of the pain.

I also changed my diet, to allow the candida overgrowth to starve and die off. No sugar, yeast, pickled foods, no oils, no fermented foods, no wheat, no bread and definitely no dairy. Dairy being the easiest to give up except for cheese. I love cheese. I come from a family (my Dad's side) with a lot of serious allergies. I also abused my body by eating more than I should, irregularly, and by eating foods less than healthy for me (like soda, candy bars and ramen noodles) as the staple of my diet for years and years. So I figure I am probably sensitive to some of the same foods as my relatives and have just been really lucky to not have problems with food until now considering how much I have abused my body. After doing this mild diet change for a week I may consider doing a full allergy cleanse, fasting and then re-introducing different foods back into my system for a while and see what I notice. I can't decide if its allergies, or just candida causing me the problems or possibly both. So now its a matter of finding any imbalance and re-balancing it. I want to be healthy. It is my main priority, especially during the winters here which are always hard on me.

Well now that I'm finally feeling better from that sinus funk, I woke up with my neck out of wack again and am in horrible pain the last two days from that. If its not one thing its another right? Yikes. Last time this happened it was so bad I couldn't even drive myself, so thankfully its not as bad as it was, but its still pretty awful, and I can't afford to go to the Dr. and get some muscle relaxers and some pain medicine. So I will have to use natural remedies such as heat and massage and just hope for the best until I can afford to go to a chiropractor.

Sorry for all the details on my illness, but just in case anyone else out there might be having similar things happen, perhaps it may be helpful to know? For anyone else its probably a huge TMI!!! So sorry about that. It's more for me and my reflection on what I experienced, what worked and what I felt.

I caught up on the whole season 4 of Lost that helped keep me from going stir crazy while I was trapped in bed and enjoyed watching Friends when Hiram was home. Jason kept Jaiden for me during the weekend thankfully which really helped me focus on taking care of me and getting better. I missed Jaiden so much and had to fight off the depression I felt at not being well enough to see him as I was hoping to go see Bolt with him on Saturday. My boss at work was able to change my hours to accomodate Jaiden's school schedule since I can't get him in daycare right now, but unfortunately only on the days I was already scheduled so I only have 15 hours per week now. Very, part-time. So naturally my stress level was outta control wondering what to do as the job market has been really bad right now and I just can't live on 15 hours a week.

I learned during the time I was sick though to just let it go and do what I need to do. Get the resume out to the jobs that are available, and just trust that I will find a way to provide for myself because I always do. I let it go because stress and worry doesn't bring any good, especially with my immune system in its frail state.

I also recognized while I was so sick in bed (yes I had a lot of time to think lol) that the path I am on is a good one. That I have eliminated people from my space that do not get me, do not genuinely care about me or do not bring positivity. It may sound rude, but I don't care, I jsut won't allow certain people into my space, and if friends of mine choose to associate with those kinds of people I have to pull myself out of their spaces somewhat too, as that energy always trickles over and I can't have drama in my life anymore. I won't allow people who have negative energy around them, who cause drama and inflict pain on others for their own enjoyment to have a place in my life. I recognize my time is precious, and limited and so I must choose carefully how and with whom I choose to spend that time. I pretty much don't do things I don't want to do anymore with few exceptions. My desire for health outweighs my desire to please others now. I have to do what is best for me. Since few of my closest friends live near me that also brings it challenges and the fact we all have different schedules makes it a challenge spending time together too. As much as we want and try to make plans, it seems rare that those plans ever come to fruiton. I am going to make some serious effort to change that from now on. Once a month I don't think is too much to ask to give of myself to those I care about. :)

I understand myself and that at this time of year my energy is limited, that I just do not have the energetic emotional or physical resources to go and do things as much as I would like and that if I push myself I will be sick, as has been the result for many years now. I give myself permission to withdraw when I need to, so that I can do what it takes to stay emotionally and physically healthy this year.

I also understand that I can still make time for those I love, and that I will do that because it is part of what makes life worth living. I need other people in my life and maybe they need me too. I just can't do late nights or smoky clubs. My immune system just can't handle not getting enough rest and for whatever reason I just cannot ever seem to sleep in even if I got to sleep at 7 am, I get up 2 hours later because my body thinks it should be up lol. I cannot tolerate smoky environments as they make me very sick and a few fun hours in a club isn't worth the two weeks it takes my body to get feeling back to normal again.

I am making more effort to spend quality time with the people I love, in relaxing intimate environments where we can relax and enjoy each other's company. I am making extra effort to make the best of the time I have with Jaiden now that he is back. I am going to find a job that I enjoy, and that will pay what I need it to. I am going to focus on my health, and my diet eating healthy foods, and learning to cook new healthy foods.